Consenting Adults (Reimagining Commitment for People and Relationships That Defy Convention)

A practical, real-life field guide to building better, fulfilling, and true-to-you relationships beyond monogamy, compulsory heterosexuality, and vanilla sex

Unlike conventional relationship self-help that measures “success” by longevity and outdated assumptions, this book helps us embody radical honesty with ourselves (and our partners) to build the kinds of relationships that feel authentic to us.

Drawing on her expertise as a licensed clinical psychologist—and her own experiences of divorce, relationships, and identity evolution—Dr. Beth Gadomski invites readers to develop relational integrity: the internal compass that reminds us to act from our authentic values as we build the relationships we want.

Partnerships built on relational integrity acknowledge a fundamental truth: each of us is evolving, all the time. And for our relationships to be fulfilling, sustainable, and aligned with our truest selves, they need to evolve with us. Dr. Gadomski shares practical tools for:

• Understanding how our "attachment style” may not be the actual issue
• Recognizing unhealthy relational patterns
• Navigating jealousy, insecurity, and other tension points
• Building capacity and aligning toward relational integrity
• Honoring the fluidity of our identities and desires
• Ending (and adapting) relationships with honesty and mutual respect
• Doing repair right
• Navigating non-monogamy and other relationship models outside the mainstream

Through interwoven narratives, Gadomski shows us the real-life consequences of disrupted relational integrity; explores the process of “identity molting”; and teaches us how to cultivate resilient, conscious connections. This book is particularly useful to readers in unconventional relationships: poly, platonic, CNM, kinky, child-free, long distance, or fluid-identity partnerships, as well as any conscious couple guided by intentional, values-aligned choices in their relationships.