Becoming Ammi (A Queer, Desi Journey into Parenthood)

From the award-winning author of Another Appalachia, an intimate portrait of queer motherhood and mother-loss—with meditations on grief, familial legacies, and selfhood

In Becoming Ammi, author and educator Neema Avashia reflects on a new stage of her life: becoming a parent.

Through short reflective chapters, Avashia weaves together stories of early motherhood as a Desi, queer, Appalachian, and non-gestational parent (a parent who did not physically carry or give birth to the child). 

Becoming Ammi is shaped by Avashia's real-time reflections written like diary entries—some fully formed, written during the quiet of 3 a.m. feedings, while others are fragmented, scribbled down in the small moments she could carve out each day. Together, the essays culminate into a deeply personal meditation on her transforming sense of self.

Written in three parts, the book explores:

• Neema’s new relationship with her daughter
• Questions of integrating her old life into her new one
• Becoming a mother while losing her own

Intimate and candid, Avashia's story will speak to anyone who does not feel like they fit into the traditional framework of “parent.”